istillbelieveinheroes | Problems: From Rookies to Babies.

Entry tags:

Problems: From Rookies to Babies.

They were on a mission in Canada. Nothing too bad about this one it seemed. Or so it was meant to be pretty easy. There was word of a device being set up there by some unknown group, that was putting off strange readings. For one, they had no intil on the group, for another they had no idea what kind of device. Both things they needed to know about. Why? Because it’s SHIELD and they need to know everything.

It wasn’t top priority however. A training mission, really. Scout and Scoot as Coulson would call it. Since the events in New York, (and, you know, living and all) Fury had been placing him on smaller training missions, when he wasn’t keeping an eye on the Avengers. He had been officially moved to the ‘Ambassador to the Avengers’ as Sitwell laughed.

The point being? This was a simple training mission that won't stay so simple. Because of the need for eyes from a distance, Clint was pulled along as well, which suited Coulson fine, really, and it might have suited Barton fine as well.

But as I said, the mission was simple that didn’t stay simple. One of their rookie Agents got himself into a spot of trouble, captured by a dart to the neck and dragged inside. Another Agent followed him in, tracking. Phil knew she was a good tracker, but he didn’t like the next problem that followed.

Communications ceased to function once the Agent’s stepped inside the small base set inside the hill side. Great.

“Barton. Lost Meyers. Lost Hutchinson. Do you have eyes on Jackson?” Their third rookie who was with them.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He blinked, surprised by the touch, and turned to look from the child to Barton. He let himself relax around Clint more then others, thus the man tended to be able to see or read his feelings and thoughts as if he spoke them.

It still startled him sometimes.

He pushed a smile at the comment, trying to look okay. "It's fine. I'm just worried about the little bird." He said, arm still turned back and softly waving her fist around his finger. For Phil, it was his fault. Trainees come on these missions to learn. They can't learn if he leaves them dead.

Clint did see a lot, and he saw past that smile, but he didn't say anything about it. He knew that nothing he could say would convince Coulson he wasn't to blame, but he still wanted to say it. Just so Coulson knew that Clint didn't blame him. He pulled his hand back, nodding.

"She'll be fine. Babies are good like that. Resilient."

He was stubborn like that, Barton. He was grateful to hear it though, because it did help. A bit. For Phil, each time one of these missions mucked up and he lost Agents, personally, he always took care of things himself. Go home after long briefings. Shower until the hot water was gone. Stretch out on the floor and stare at the ceiling, convincing himself it was alright.

He didn't drink like he used to in the older days. That was a plus. After convincing himself things would be alright and that he needed to take care of things in the morning, he'd generally be reformed back into Agent Coulson and able to presses the situation, deal with Evals and continue on. It was a method that worked well for him.

For now? He couldn't go home. This was part of the first step. Just relax, suck it up, be Agent. Take care of the mess first. "Babies are resilient. Though this one has so much anger on her little face. Even when she looks like she's sleeping." Which she was doing now, head turned to the side, fist tight on Phil's finger and with an angry scrunched up face, she slept.

Clint kept watch on Coulson out of the corner of his eye as he drove, wishing there were more he could do. He'd seen Coulson like this so many times, and he knew by tomorrow the agent would be back to his usual self or as close as could be expected, but it didn't stop him wanting to do something now.

"SHIELD will find her a good family," he said quietly. "Eventually, she'll forget about it. She'll...be happy."

He generally put himself back together, on his own, almost all the time. Now shouldn't be any different. He can't help others if he lets himself fall apart each time. He frowned though, as Clint mentioned them finding her a good family.

"Maybe. Depends on what they did to her. Who's child she was even. If she starts glowing green and spitting fire she might end up elsewhere for a while." Oh, so he was a bit worried that she wasn't normal.

"Yeah, but either way, it'll be better."

Even if she did start glowing green and spitting fire, he was pretty confident SHIELD wasn't going to stick her in a lab somewhere and start running experiments. Not with Fury as director.

"True." It would be better. For some reason this one got to him. He'd make sure it would be better then poked and prodded. Poor dear.

"You ever thought of them? Having..." He tipped his head back to the bundle in the car seat.

Clint glanced at her in the rearview mirror again. Yeah, he'd thought about it. But what he'd thought was that he'd be the worst dad ever, and anyway, not like he actually could have a kid. Not with his life.

So he shook his head. "Not really."

Phil just gave a soft Mmm like hum of an answer, as if that were enough. It's what he figured the man would say. It just made sense, he supposed. Someone like Barton, always on the move. An assassin with morals. He wouldn't think about it, would he.

"I thought you'd say that."

Clint's eyes flicked over to Coulson and back to the road. He wanted to ask why Coulson said that, but he figured he probably didn't want to know.

"What about you, sir?"

He settled back in the seat again, a bit better, thought he kept his arm turned back, so his finger never left her hand. An awkward way to go, but it seemed to keep her calm.

"Mmm... sometime again. I suppose I thought about it. Get married, have kids, nice little house, serve the country, that kind of thing." He smiled over at Barton, a bit of a bitter smile. "But then I joined SHIELD."

"Yeah," Clint says, returning the smile with one of his own.

"Do you ever wish you didn't?" It's important to know. If Coulson ever left SHIELD, Clint would probably be right behind him.

Sometimes. Sometimes he wished he didn't. Then he might have had something normal. His parents would have been happier about that, wouldn't they? But he didn't take long before he said. "No. I think I'd do it over again, if given the choice." And after a short pause added, with a glance to Clint, but they a glance to the girl. "There would be too many people lost if I never joined. A few too many important people to lose if I had never joined." Clint being the big one, really.

Clint nodded. "I'm glad you did."

For many reasons, one of them being that he almost definitely would never have ended up with SHIELD otherwise.

"I don't regret it anymore." He said with a smile, closing his eyes for a moment. He liked to think, even if he shouldn't think of the man too deeply, that he liked having Barton around. He would have missed that if he wasn't here with SHIELD.

"As for Babies. I suppose that stopped with SHIELD. Dating is next to impossible after all. And this is the life I do best." He chuckled, teasing a bit there. After all, you can't date someone and tell them you are an accountant.

"You're really good at that," Clint said with a nod.

"Do you ever think about it anymore?"

He'd hate to think Coulson felt like he was losing something to stay with SHIELD.

HE blinked at that, as if trying to bring up the right response. Though he wasn't sure what that was. Then after a moment he shook his head. "I wouldn't make a good father." It didn't really answer the question of if he thought about it. "Wouldn't be enough hours in the day."

Clint accepts it, though, since it's the same reason he had for not answering that question.

"Yeah, me either."

"Really?" He asked, glancing at him now. "I think you'd make a good father, once you know how to hold a tiny human." He mused, a slight smirk. "You make the time for things. I can see you managing it."

He shook his head. "I don't... It wouldn't be a good idea."

He didn't want to turn out like his dad.

Sore subject. He noticed that. Drawing his hand away from the baby he reached it out to pat the mans shoulder, giving it a small squeeze. "You're notorious for not giving yourself enough credit, you realize." But he didn't push. He thought it might be asking for too much.

Besides, it's not like Barton was going to go out, find himself a girl and settle down. Though, that would be nice for him.

... Yes.

"I know my limitations," Clint said quietly, though he smiled a little at the touch.

He glanced over at Coulson a moment, and then said, "You'd make a good dad, though."

"Only because I wouldn't want to be my own father." He said with a small flat smile. Only to pause and glance back as the child started to fuss, her fist waving. He let Barton's shoulder go and reached back again. The child oddly calming once she had his finger again.

"I wouldn't have the time for kids anymore." Much like he was used to when he was young. "Good fathers would be there." He said with that flat smile, then a small shrug of a shoulder, wiggling his finger around. "Something would come up and I'd off to help save the world and miss a recital."

This was more of him then one might know about his past, only it's barely anything at all of it. Still, those are worries.

"I think if the worst you do to your kids is miss a recital now and the, you're still doing pretty well," Clint commented, watching the interaction with amusement.

HE gave a small huff, smiling a bit more at that. "Our line of work's no good for a family. Barely good for meeting people let alone a family. I don't think there's really much to worry about there. I'll be sticking around to toss you orders for some time."

Or so he hoped. If he didn't get the man killed on some foolish mission. Ug, bad thought. He wiggled the sleeping babes hand again.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject